DeterminationDetermination is a word we don't normally consider synonymous with happiness – but it is! I'm not referring to the grit-your-teeth or gird-your-loins type of effort and concentration. In this context it simply means to relax and choose what it is that you feel would bring the most happiness into your life. Take an inventory of the things you feel are impediments to your happiness and determine to change them. This does not mean to focus on the negative in your life, but rather to plan to take steps to change whatever it is you feel interferes with your quest for happiness. Focusing on the negative is apt to simply bring more negativity into your life, while planning offers you the opportunity to change the things in your life you're not happy with. There is a difference! For instance, if you have a job that you don't really like or that leaves you feeling unfulfilled, don't simply gnash your teeth over it. Rather, plan on how you can change it. This could, obviously, include looking for a job at another company, which may be difficult with the current economic crisis. It is not, however, impossible unless you make it so by refusing to apply yourself to a job search. Use determination to keep you trying to improve your situation. You may require more education if you choose to try a different line of work. So take steps to look into where you can acquire the education you might need and also resources that may help you to pay for the education that you require. Never work for a jerk – if you can help it! Working in a toxic environment can leave you with stress that can permeate every area of your life. If you're stressed and angry coming home from work in all likelihood it's the people that mean the most to you that will suffer for it – your family. Also we all need to keep in mind the negative impact stress has on our health. Stress has been linked to almost all of the illnesses afflicting modern day humanity. Is your job really worth dying for? By using determination you can resolve this and similar issues in your life. Working for a bully is a surefire recipe for misery! I've had jobs where I went to work dreading the entire commute there. Like most people I kept telling myself – That's just the way it is, all jobs are like that! It was, of course, simply a poor excuse on my part that kept me from getting off my butt and finding better opportunities. Don't succumb to the same attitude. If you're telling yourself – "That's just the way it is!" remember that it's only that way because we allowed it to become like that by settling for whatever we could get. We teach people how to treat us. Don't stop looking for opportunities to improve your lot in life or you could consign yourself to a lifetime of misery. Isn't your happiness worth more than that? Your life is a precious gift – don't squander it being miserable. Don't focus on the misery; rather, use it as a goad to improve your circumstances and yourself. Use any negativity you come up against in life to fuel your determination to improve your circumstances. I think it's fair to say that most of us are usually willing to settle for whatever life hands us – particularly in tough economic times. These are also times when employers are the most likely to take even more advantage of those that work for them. All they have to do is dangle the specter of unemployment over their worker's heads and the fear does the rest. We should keep in mind that during the last Great Depression more fortunes were made than at almost any time in the history of the world! For those with an entrepreneurial spirit, this could open the door to considering opportunities you had never given much thought to before. Although it may seem difficult, try not to succumb to negativity and despair. Rather, use determination to explore options you may have never considered before. You never know – you just might improve your standard of living and gain your freedom as well. Relationships are another major factor to consider where our happiness is concerned. For most people this is an even stronger influence in our lives than our work. For many people this is the overriding factor when they consider their happiness. However, as we all know, relationships can be extraordinarily complex and even more difficult to deal with than a poor employment situation. When our emotions are involved it can be even more difficult to walk away than when money is involved, for some people. However, determination can help us to not only resolve issues with our partner, but to refuse to settle for less than a fulfilling relationship. If you have a troubled relationship, face the facts that it won't fix itself. Communication is the key to resolve most of the issues we deal with in relationships. We cannot read our partner's mind anymore than they can read ours. If you have issues to deal with – talk about it! Even if this sometimes means seeking professional help to resolve the issues, do so. Relationships do take work. I suppose it all boils down to what the relationship means to you. If it's important - work on it. If you have a partner that refuses to communicate, you can seek help in learning to resolve the issues on your own. This approach is similar to the programs that support the loved ones of substance abusers. Seeking help could offer strategies to draw your partner out and get them to cooperate in healing your relationship. To do otherwise is to resign yourself to living a life that becomes a dull ache and that is surely no road to happiness. Where happiness is concerned we need to use determination to guide us. We need to determine to be happy! Find the areas of your life that need work and determine to change them. Happiness is a choice that we all want to make, but many of us often neglect to do so. Often people allow themselves to get so trapped in the status quo that they don't realize their angst and that life is slipping on by. Many times this is due to the fear of change that many of us possess. Change can be frightening, but it can also be exhilarating and lead us to a better life if we allow it to. Set your fears aside and strive for a better tomorrow. Don't let negativity bog you down. Rather, use determination to choose happiness for yourself. See the stumbling blocks in your life and plan ways and strategies to implement to circumvent them. Happiness is a choice and determination can be your friend in its pursuit. Be determined to bring more happiness into your life. I don't think I have to tell you that you will be glad you did! Remember, determination is not Anger!
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